Life Was Too Kind

It was his only option, to overdose on the recently purchased pills.

He was tired of the cuts themselves, the drinking to get rid of the pain.

It was part of him now; at least he believed it was.

That way he wouldn’t be alone, scared, abused by the instability of his thoughts.

Just but a distant memory to others, no one fathomed his existence.

A silent shock to his system, it was.

He has been through enough, but the universe wasn’t finished with him.

Even the once energetic full of life friends were no more.

He was deemed too shattered and un-repairable!

Should have kept better friends, but why?

Not even the unveiling of the spirit world saw it coming.

The betrayal, the anxiety, the reprimand, the deeper voices,

With every breathe, he reckoned too well of the broken pieces,

Pieced together with the hope of having one normal night, like everyone!

Sleepless nights were his deal, to be awake in the middle of the nights.

Hearing his own thoughts, traveling across his own built up nightmares.

Maybe to get her thoughts tired enough and out of his mind.

To acknowledge there’s more music to life, than pieces of a broken symphony.

Rejection went through his nerves like a drug, stimulating places he knew nothing about.

In full reverential respect of a new world brimming with bits and pieces of suicidal emotions,

You just had to pick your preferred!

But not him, he chose to feel it all.

To fill up his temple, in the hope of one day drowning in it!

The mere understanding of zero outcomes, aftermath of remitting his all to her,

Couldn’t receive anything at all!

Completely drawing the last straw, Life was too kind however.

In a way, his awareness to cover his wrists no more, the scars had healed.

He craved for a new antidote, because his wrists weren’t edging him off.

Lost in it, life was too kind to give him time for the healing process.

Slowly, as sure as the moon rises over the horizon, scars became fairy-tales for his sleepless nights.

Deep enough, the scars reigned on, asking for more!

More reason to stay awake throughout the dark nights.

To him, they were better than reality, better than the rejection he faced alone.

That was the deal for rejection, being alone, in a life that was too kind.

He watched consistently as mist formed against the cracked pane-less window,

An amplified showcase of what he was, broken, without her love!

The arguments, the break ups, the jealousy, all led here, the finale.

He placed one after the other, in his eagerly awaiting mouth, five to the count.

Reaching out for the glass brimmed with water, to gush it all down,

Lips drawing closer to the glass edge,

But men, just pause!

His phone rang!

And it was hers, her number calling in the deepest parts of the night.

Picking up, her mother yells she’s unconscious! Come to the hospital! She swallowed some pills!

In the tension of the moment, he swallows!

darkness-04

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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About menjustpause

Your Averagely Depressed Guy

One response to “Life Was Too Kind

  1. people forget that pain is usually just for a while

    Like

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