Walkway To His Heaven

“I still remember the day I left him.

It was cold.

Not your typical cold weather, but my heart was cold.

Full of anger and possibilities of fun, I convinced myself he didn’t need me.

He didn’t need my loved-filled heart.

He needed to blossom.

And the only way was if he didn’t have my baggage.

You see, my beauty and think what baggage would I possibly have?

My constant nagging, my constant drinking, my constant shopping, my constant male friends!

You see, my heart was cold, and full of fun visions.

His was warm, and full of visions.

Even constant calls wasn’t enough, he still texted, cared, loved me.

But I didn’t need him, apart from the occasional steams of passions.

He was amazing, I wasn’t.

He said I was 99% angel and cared less of the 1% devil.

I said he should worry. The 1% was part of each of the 99% angel.

He forgave my young heart even when I indulged deeper into pleasures.

I needed more roughness around the steamy edges.

Then, I saw him walk by the other day!

Lovely strides I thought.

The kinds that make you want with desire.

Then a lady approached him, simple to the eye, sophisticated to the mind.

I never saw any beauty that matched to hers; I’m still impressed, to date.

She hugged him, kissed him lightly on his soft lips; I remember their taste so vividly.

How I wish I had them next to my neck, breathing gentle warm air as he talks about his world.

I was destroyed, crumbled from within.

She, all the while carried a small child, seemingly theirs.

My heart grew softer, warmer.

A tear dropped right out of his heaven’s gates.

Yes, he called my eyes the gates to a walkway to his heaven.

I turned around, and walked away to the path I came with.

Holding on tightly to a shopping bag filled with a drunk’s shopping.

A faint whisper of a child calling him daddy broke my heart.

Carried by the winds, to torment me I presumed.

It broke, to a thousand pieces.

I guess that’s how he felt when I left.”

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Last Night

Last night, you were still there.

Behind the curtain walls, you smiled a disastrously light smile.

Today, as I walked down the stairs, you reminded me.

That you of all would hardly leave, you could have guessed my outright reaction.

Tomorrow, the Sun will shine, brighter than any star embedded deep in your fiery eyes.

Last night, I dined on privileges far reaching beyond my short sightedness.

I was utterly abashed with my inexperience, but I kept up with my eager learning.

Today, the change was overwhelming.

Dismayed, I had to put two and two together as they unfolded.

Tomorrow, always brought with it hope of a continuity of a journey.

Until now, I held firmly to roads less traveled, are better traveled alone!

Last night, you took it upon yourself to change that.

You fascinated over how an eagle was perfectly embodied into its environment.

Today, i engrossed myself in how such a journey lead to its mightiness in the sky.

The very elements of nature, shaping its journey, nurturing its ways, bring it to survival.

Tomorrow, as lay my eyes upon your graced innovated beauty, a blue-star diamond.

A distorted notion, ends can never justify the means.

Last night, you stood high and mighty, infuriated!

By the needs that never come, I was to provide it all, insufficiency on my path.

Today, however!

Charged with allure of being amazed with what you exactly needed versus what you exactly had, were one of the same.

Tomorrow, those stars filled in her tenacious eyes, will resolute.

And hold me captive as I drop down on my knees.

Last night, you finally saw me.

In warmth, I was immersed in its purest form of oblivion, your beauty of a blue-star diamond.

Today, the world smiled back.

From within, it consumed, a consuming fire so beautiful and ugly, it raged.

Tomorrow was light hours away.

Ice, in a cold heart that sought warmth, not the fire that resided in your eyes drew me closer.

Last night, it was accelerated fire, leaving behind nothing but dark soot remains.

Once pale, now it was shielded by a thin veil of authentic truth.

Today, love licks it all off, the soot.

A blazing inferno of cold ice draws me closer, always and forever.

Tomorrow, all that would have survived after its staggering speeds was mine to discover.

What was once beautiful was an enigmatically mysterious beauty now.

Last night, I knew I had forever to be astounded by it.

I wasn’t to off to be blamed as it had finally come to be picked up by me.

Today, it’d go through your slithering soft maiden heart finger.

A symbolic two dolphin-encrusted blue-star diamond ring, to you, to let you be cautious that we needed forever!

Tomorrow would be another day.

Continuously learning to be learnt, of why you said yes, rather than No.

But men, just pause…

Last night, we discovered a something!

Of splitting it into two, each carried by the other, split into always and forever!

Today, was our always!

Always of never being apart!

Tomorrow was ours, forever!

Forever of always being together!

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Gentle-Wrong-Men, Right?

Let’s be not-belligerent here, nothing is ever perfect, especially men in relationships.

The momentum we have in going into a relationship as a man and keeping it up are always indirectly proportional to each other. It’s not, actually, as easy as it sounds for a man to put up with distinct aspects from his life. Deep down, it takes courage for any man, in whichever age-bracket, to come to terms with failure. Even more so when it comes to admitting it in front of a woman he loves. Therefore, many times a man will need not to be judged by his woman. Some say the strength of a woman is not in what she has endured or achieved in her life, but in how much she has uplifted her man when he was nothing but a dead beat. Well I’d say it takes courage for any feminist woman out there to accept such sentiments.

A simple sit down with a woman who wants to hear more about what lingers in your mind, appreciating how you articulate the language of your heart into words, and drive your dreams to manifest them into tangible reality goes a long way in a man’s book. A woman, who not only listens to your language, but is driven with initiative to act on it, deserves the best kind of love. And a man knows that deep down. Sex will no longer intrigue him the moment he crosses path with such a woman. What will fancy his liking is the desire to cherish quality moments with her, a desire to step forward in unfamiliar waters, chartered by the very few brave souls.

Molded men, often from self-enlightenment, will desire to initiate intimacy. Intimacy to open up hidden doors of love, that didn’t exist before you were acquitted. To connect so deeply that he’ll always be at the back of your mind. To establish a connection that is dangerously vivid even when 5 other women are giving him attention, you are the only one who has his. Another day to such men is nothing but a blessing to love you more, to care for you until you feel heaven on earth. Tailor-making attitudes along the way, learning, step by step, different ways to show you love. When life pushes him back, he has a reason to push back harder! Because of you! He won’t change because of you, but because life has delivered him to the weighing scales. Scales where he has to make a choice to either make one towards you which he will not regret, or take cowardly strides to be the same and lose a perfectly good woman. Not that all women are good, then again neither are they all bad.

At even given time of a man’s life, he knows exactly where he wants to be. And why he feels the desire to be there. Sometimes bad things happen, consistently, but it is at those moments that redefine how he sees you and your position in his life. So why not take your position as a woman and help him glide through murky waters. It might be long and weary, it might happen to the best of you, it might be dark and scary, but at the end of it all even stars shine brighter on a clear sky. He’ll be gentle in loving you, disciplined in loving you yet so motivated in life to bring a difference into your lives. Because of you, he will have the strength and passion to reach for the stars to light up your world. He will be going nowhere without you. You’ll be a compass in his hand.

So at the end of the day, any man who opens his heart to love is brave, yet so foolish in society’s view. For the gentle-wrong-man of the society, even after enjoying the fruity rewards of a woman, they’ll immediately tumble over to long for another woman’s embrace, indulging their lust with her. No matter how hard a gentleman will seek to love and cherish you, the reality of the matter will never change. He will become oblivious, his life destroyed the moment you separate his genitals with his brains. So what if men are compared to dogs? Dogs love unconditionally, loyal to a fault, self-sacrificing, protective of their loved ones, cute and fierce at the same time, a man’s best friend and the most consistent companion. They are known to even wait forever or starve themselves waiting for their master to come back. At extreme ends, dogs take long journeys just to be reunited with their families. The only bad side that crops up is when they are abused and they have to defend themselves with every wit in their bones.

But no, men are gentle creatures, misunderstood by a society that encourages stereotypical set branding and banishes any re-branding efforts to term our men as loving, caring, nurturing and hands down loyal to a cause. 277856

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